That will have cleared things up nicely

The long-awaited court appearance of the Infanta Cristina reportedly resulted in 400 responses of ‘I don’t know’ and 50 of ‘I don’t remember’. The rest of the responses to questions posed by judge José Castro were apparently equally informative, being such answers as ‘I didn’t know’, ‘I had no knowledge’, ‘I am not aware’ and ‘I wasn’t aware’. Sounds like …

Cleaner takes the biscuit

Cleaner throws out ‘broken biscuits’ lying on the floor at art gallery, unaware it was an installation worth £8,000

And who could blame them

According to a winter survey, four out of every ten in Andalucia would not bother to vote if an election were to be held now.

Small talk

The two ‘petite’ police firearms officers set to receive £35,000 each because the guns were ‘too big for their hands’ Will they turn down the cheque because it is too big for their petite pockets?

Plan your invasion accordingly

French fighter jets accompanied hijacked Ethiopian plane into Geneva when co-pilot threatened to crash because Swiss air-force ONLY WORKS OFFICE HOURS

Park it if you can

A test of parking spaces in 17 European nations found the smallest to be in….Spain

How disappointing

I turned on the TV to watch the fighting and an ice hockey match broke out