Each year at the Edinburgh Festival, an award is given to the funniest joke of the Edinburgh Fringe Festival, and this year’s winner is Canadian comedian Stewart Francis. He had to beat off some heavy competition to claim the award. Here are what were considered to be the ten funniest jokes (and imagine what the rest must have been like):
A good deed indeed
Amidst all the doom and gloom, it’s always nice to read a story with a happy ending, such as is the case with young Olympic torch bearer Kieran Maxwell. Money Well Spent
When is a contract not a contract?
Best answer seems to be, ‘when it is with a bank and favours the customer’. Around 230,000 small business customers in the UK will be affected by Santander’s U-turn relating to accounts originally advertised as ‘free forever’. Small business customers are being told their accounts will now cost between £7.50 and £40 a month, with extra charges levied for paying …
Ullo John Got a New Wife
Former deputy PM John ‘Two Jags’ Prescott accused Tory MP Grant Schapps of advertising Thai Brides on his website. Schapps duly pointed out that adverts are based on visitors’ previous browser use and that the pictures he had seen had been generated by advertising software that had tracked previous internet searches on the peer’s own computer.
Oh so personal apology
Actress Kristen Stewart has issued a public apology to Robert Pattinson, her boyfriend and Twilight co-star, after reports she had a fling with a married director.
Trial and error
…Terry was asked to repeat the evidence that he had been sent off four times in his career, so the court could hear him. “Can you say, please, four times?” asked his QC, George Carter-Stephenson. “Please, please, please, please,” Terry responded.
Ryanair after Aer Lingus again
Ryanair has launched its third bid for rival airline Aer Lingus, despite previous attempts having been blocked on competition grounds. Ryanair is offering €1.30 per Aer Lingus share in an all cash bid, valuing the Irish flag carrier at around €694 million.
Says it all
An excellent cartoon in the Telegraph in the aftermath of the British PM forgetting his daughter in the pub – he’ll never live that one down! Cartoon
Food for complaints
The Advertising Standards Authority (ASA) in the UK has been in existence for 50 years now, has received a grand total of 431,000 complaints (a record 31,548 in 2011) and the most complained about ad was a KFC offering in 2005 with 1,671 complaints.
No time for heroes
A British woman was mauled by supposedly tame cheetahs at a safari park in South Africa. While she suffered and other visitors to the park tried to pull the animals off her, the woman’s husband risked life and limb by staying on the other side of the fence capturing the whole event on film! Mauled by Cheetahs “The couple were …